Love After Loss: Saying Yes to Possibility

I started dating again this year. Slowly. Carefully. With equal parts curiosity and hesitation.

I’ve been trying to meet people in real life through singles’ social clubs. The truth? I haven’t found that connection…yet. But these events have gotten me out into the world again, laughing, moving, trying new things. And that feels good.

I also hired a matchmaker to set me up on dates. It feels vulnerable, but also exciting, like giving myself permission to try in a different way. And soon, I’ll be re-entering the world of online dating. This isn’t my first time. The first round, I met someone fairly quickly, and we dated for a couple of years. He wasn’t my forever person, but the relationship gave me valuable experience and growth. Later, I tried again with diligence, following best practices I learned from my favorite dating coach, Bela Gandhi (if you haven’t checked out her podcasts, they’re full of wisdom and encouragement). That round brought a lot of dates, but still not my person…yet.

And that word yet is important to me. I haven’t given up hope. I believe he’s out there.

Steve, My Daughters, and This Next Chapter

Whenever I think about dating, I think of Steve. I know in my heart that he would want me to find companionship again; to laugh, to be cared for and to share life with someone new. His love for me was always about wanting the best for me, and I carry that with me still.

My daughters feel the same way. They want me to be happy and not live the rest of my life alone. And yet, my dating is also a reminder to them that they lost their dad. That part is hard. Grief ripples in ways we don’t always expect.

But I believe that when I do find my person, he will embrace my past, honor the love I shared with Steve and respect the bond I have with my daughters. Together, we will figure out how to blend our families and grow something beautiful. Not a replacement, but a new chapter, woven with the threads of love, memory and possibility.

Dating as a Widow

Navigating the world of dating as a widow is a deeply personal journey. There’s no standard timeline, no magic formula for “readiness.” Each path is shaped by the love and loss engraved in our hearts. What matters most is that you trust yourself.

Before diving into profiles, meet-ups or matchmaking, pause to reflect:

1. Have I given myself time to heal?

   Healing isn’t linear, and there’s no universal clock. But creating space to honor your emotions can give you a stronger foundation for what’s next.

   
   

2. What’s motivating me?

   Am I moving toward love, joy and companionship, or away from fear and loneliness? That distinction matters. When your “why” is grounded in love, you’ll make choices that align with your true desires.

   
   

3. How do I hold space for my late partner while opening my heart to new love?

   A new relationship won’t replace what you shared. It isn’t supposed to. But it can coexist with your memories, adding fresh chapters of joy and connection to your story.

Give Yourself Permission

The most important step? Permission. Permission to want companionship in whatever form feels right, whether that’s romance, friendship or someone to share dinner and laughter with. Permission to move forward at your own pace. Permission to believe that love, in its many forms, can return.

Dating in today’s world may feel overwhelming—apps, profiles, swipes—but remember, you get to set the boundaries that protect your heart. You get to decide what fits and what doesn’t.

Whether you are just beginning to wonder, actively dating or happily single, this is your journey. And you’re not alone in it.